YA'LL ARE TRUNKY!

You guys crack me up! Everyone has been asking me if my Momma has gone crazy yet being this close to picking me up. I think it’s ok for you all to go a little crazy:) Today I was very grateful for all of your emails and the pictures! Especially from Keg and Taylor Walker! Thanks guys!

But I’m excited to see you all. I was wondering if you could come say hi and spend a week here and then leave me? Think that would work? Just an idea:) I feel like the closer it gets, the more attached to my mission I become. It’s been so good this past week, we have been so busy that I haven't even had time to think about it. This week we had a mission wide leadership training and it was AWESOME!! It definitely kept our hands full!

I’ve been thinking about it a lot and I know a lot of missionaries fear and avoid the end, but I’m excited! I think if you have done everything you could, you should be able to go home happy and fulfilled and able to hit the next stage of life just as hard as you hit the mission. It’s gonna be the test of EVERYTHING that I learned on my mission. I say, “Bring it on!” It doesn't however make leaving any easier. It will break my heart to leave this place. But I've come to learn that it’s not always about what Elder Smith wants. It took 21 years to learn that;) I have seen the importance of working up until the last minute. There’s no getting around it, I think you definitely see your true colors in the last few weeks. 

But, I actually wanted to share one of the most special experiences of my mission with you all today. It starts back in Laredo when one of my district leaders invited me to set a mission baptismal goal; the number of people I wanted to find, teach, and baptize on my mission. He then told me, “It’s not about the number, but it’s about being accountable to the Lord and showing him how many people you want to bring unto Christ.” Of course I wanted to bring thousands unto my Savior! That’s why I came! So I set a goal that was rather high. I prayed to my Father in Heaven pleading with him to guide me to that many specific people that I could love with all my heart and bring them to the knowledge of the Gospel. 

The first few months was rough. We didn't find or baptize hardly anyone. I was rather discouraged and quickly put that goal and commitment with the Lord out of my mind. But, as I went through my mission, the success started to come. I began to find people that stole my heart. I loved them SO MUCH! And every time we found them and were able to baptize them I felt the love of my Heavenly Father letting me know that they were some of the ones that he had promised me.  Some of the ones that were waiting. That feeling fired me up a lot. I quickly repented of forgetting that commitment I had made with Him and promised I would do EVERYTHING in my power to reach that goal, that I wouldn't miss a single soul that He had prepared for me. There was a lot of ground to make up, but He definitely began to bless me. 

The months passed and I came closer and closer, until this last month. I was ONE short of my goal and ALL of our baptisms had dropped. I felt an uncomfortable weight on my shoulders, feeling that I hadn't given everything or maybe I had missed one of His children along the way. I spent many nights crying unto Him, asking for forgiveness and praying for a miracle. With 3 weeks left......nothing. Too short of time to find someone and get all the way through the teaching process. It seemed almost hopeless. I couldn't help but feel that if I went home one short, I would feel like it wasn't quite finished. 

Then 6 days ago we decided to give it to the Lord. Elder Stott and I started a special fast for that one person who would finish my mission. We fasted that day and nothing came until the last 5 minutes of our fast. As we stood in line to buy some fruit to break our fast the phone rang, it was Bishop Vargas. "Elder, I just wanted to call and tell you that a new family moved into your area 10 minutes ago and they need some help moving in. Could you come?" ABSOLUTELY! "Oh and just so you know, the mom isn't a member yet."

My heart filled with hope! This was gonna be it!!! We got in the car and flew over to their house to meet the Medina family. The sweetest, most humble family ever. Within 20 minutes we had set a baptismal date for the 24th, one day after I leave. So grateful for the answered fast, but still sad about the goal I set with the Lord, I continued to pray, harder and HARDER. I guess you could say it was selfish of me, but it meant SO MUCH!

I have a testimony that God answered prayers. I have seen it so many times. I know how much He loves us and that He won’t EVER let us down. I really needed a miracle and even though it was a selfish thing, He knew how much I wanted it. Never doubt that he listens.

The second lesson we had a FHE with the bishop and discovered that Sister Medina knew nearly everything and had been to church before in Mexico! In the last 5 minutes, the bishop invited her to be baptized on Sunday - TOMORROW! I must have looked ridiculous cus tears were streaming down my face. She agreed to this Sunday, and she is completely ready! Finding her, teaching her, and getting to the baptism in less than 2 weeks! It was a miracle!

I Love my Heavenly Father so much. He has changed me completely. I never deserved such an incredible mission, but He gave it to me anyway. I feel SO indebted to Him but know that He's expecting a lot of me for the rest of my life. He expects a lot of us:) I know that after the baptism of Sister Medina, I will feel that love just as I always have. That love that He has for these people, His children. It’s more contagious that any feeling that you could ever feel.

I love you all so much and hope you all know that I KNOW that He lives, loves us, and always hears us.

I look forward to seeing you all soon.

Love, Elder Payton Smith

I WANT TO FINISH WITH WOBBLY LEGS, FALLING INTO THE FINISH LINE

Thank you for all your emails. You all are so great! I have the best family ever:) I’ve been thinking about you and just how grateful I am. Never missed a week of emailing me. Pretty faithful I’d say:) Thank you for that! I feel very blessed.

Coming into this last month I’m just so grateful for the mission God has allowed me to serve and for this time I have still to serve. It is SO precious to me. I’ve thought alot about how you can tell someone served a good mission. I know there are alot of missionaries that would say that the titles of District or Zone Leaders or even Assistant are what make you a good missionary. I have realized that that’s not gonna get me anywhere in Idaho or in life haha! I’m grateful for these opportunities I've had to serve with MY Presidents and for all they have taught me and I know that the things I have learned and the experiences I have had are what have made me.  

President Maluenda taught me a big lesson. He said that you can tell how successful someone’s mission was by the person they are when they go home. How they apply the things they learned, how they treat everyone, how they talk, how they carry themselves.  Different scene, different actors, but the principles NEVER change. And then he kinda shocked me when he said, "Elder Smith, everything you have done in these past few years doesn't mean a thing if you go home the same person you were before." I think I've been stressing about the last little changes I want to make in myself before the end, hoping I am changed enough. I truly am so grateful for the Atonement of my Savior and the way it can enter into someones life and change and mold them, scrape of the rough edges, take away the hard feelings, wash away the guilt, and then build you back into something you never could have been without His help.

Sometimes I feel like I’m not deserving of the INCREDIBLE mission that God has given me. It is the best! But I think the thing I wanted to share most today was my gratitude for you all preparing me for my mission, for my whole life. I wish I could express how much that means to me, and how much this place means to me.

For Alex, I’m sooo proud of you. You HAVE to be SO excited for your mission! It is 10000000X better than football or anything else you could ever do! I’m so proud of the football player you are, and the student, and the brother!! I’ll be so proud when we have another Elder Smith out in the field. In this family we serve missions! That’s for you too Addi, we have some amazing sister missionaries here. You will be great.

I feel like I’m getting to that last stretch of the 400x. Remember when I would always bust past Chan in my Skyline speed suit leatart;) The way your legs get kinda wobbly from the long race, but you just run harder and harder. I wanna finish, falling into the finish line! I’m grateful for you all. From sitting in the stands at ever football game and track meet and every basketball game, and now the mission. . . The most faithful fans. It has always made me wanna run harder:)

This is the greatest thing I've ever done. The funnest, the craziest, the scariest, the most magical, spiritual, lovable, memorable, exciting thing I HAVE EVER DONE! I’m pretty determined to finish that way. We are teaching a bunch of families. Unfortunately, they all are looking to get baptized the week after I leave, but the important thing is that they get baptized. We’ll see what miracles God has up his sleeve.

But for my most faithful fans, I love you all so much. Thank you for everything:)

I will see you soon!

Love Elder Smith